Sunday, September 14, 2008

Les Miles Hopes For Divine Intervention

Les Miles Hopes For Divine Intervention
for Gods Among Men: Coaches and Coordinators in the SEC

When Tropical Storm Faye turned towards Alabama on August 26, 2008, Les Miles knew that his question-mark filled 2008 LSU Bayou Tigers, defending National Champions, would have to play darkhorse underdog Appalachin State. The Three-Time Defending FCS (formerly Division II) National Champions had defeated Les Miles' beloved alma mater Michigan in the season opener the previous year, and he must have been plagued by nitemares for months in consideration of lightening striking twice.

Accordingly, the game officials moved the game time up from 7:00PM to 10:30AM, which, on the surface looks like it would have been a handicap for LSU (notoriously sloppy in Les Miles era in games before 3:00PM). After LSU handily tore Appalachin State apart, the App St. players and staff were rushed off field, forced to change out of their game uniforms without showering and ushered out of town without even the customary post-game meal.

On September 6, 2008, Les Miles was incredibly relieved and knew that he could do a lot more relaxing and beer drinking when Hurricane Gustav postponed LSU's next matchup against Sun Belt Spread Offense Powerhouse Troy until November. Imagine Les Miles' surprise, relief, and feeling of a wasted week of practice when he found out he was "coaching" all week as opposed to sleeping, eating, bullshitting with his assistant coaches, napping and drinking beer.

Nick NITELITE Saban, head coach of the Alabama Crimson Tide, on the other hand, has earned cudos for his treatment of the Tulane team following Alabama's home win over the Green Wave.

LSU made contingency plans to move the North Texas game to Dallas, Atlanta, Shreveport or New Orleans with Hurricane Ike approaching but the storm took a turn for the south Texas coastline instead. Les Miles was incredibly disappointed when the game was not cancelled or postponed.

Now Les Miles is currently hoping that Ex-Hurrican Josephine can re-generate in the Atlantic and swoop up near Alabama in the next few days, postponing the upcoming game in Auburn versus the Tigers. Otherwise the now largely unproven Bayou Tigers will have to go into Jordan-Hare Stadium without having worked out the kinks that Auburn no doubt has ironed out it it's tune-up games versus Louisiana-Monroe, Southern Miss and Mississippi State.

In particular the damage done to the LSU Bayou Tigers by not playing Troy could be in that Troy is a reverred Spread Offense school and most recent previous home for Auburn's Offensive Coordinator Tony Franklin. Franklin's Undefeateable Patented Offensive System© is so far still undefeated in Auburn, although Saturday's meager baseball-score win of 3-2 over Mississippi State may mean that the Auburn Tigers are just weak enough for a lazy and ill-prepared LSU team to face and do well against.

Les Miles' dream of playing LESS, not MORE, games of college football each year is so close to coming true he can taste it.